Wednesday, June 30, 2010
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
I've said it before and I will say it again, its the little things that matter. Small needless unimportant things, that make the difference in life. Something to show that you matter, above anything and everything else.
And yet, again, disappointment. A simple txt or bbm is too much to ask.... a quick hey I thought about you..... I fucking hate romance movies, and MSN's list of 15 things every wife/husband should do.... can totally kiss my ass.... and romantic comedies too.... Thanks Hollywood, for prepping us for the real romantic world... Oh wait, you didn't! You led us to think that all men are silly and fun and thoughtful.... and do things for you with out being asked.... and promote random acts of kindness....
Fuck off and Die movieland.
An orgasm a day keeps the doctor away, Mae West
And yet, again, disappointment. A simple txt or bbm is too much to ask.... a quick hey I thought about you..... I fucking hate romance movies, and MSN's list of 15 things every wife/husband should do.... can totally kiss my ass.... and romantic comedies too.... Thanks Hollywood, for prepping us for the real romantic world... Oh wait, you didn't! You led us to think that all men are silly and fun and thoughtful.... and do things for you with out being asked.... and promote random acts of kindness....
Fuck off and Die movieland.
An orgasm a day keeps the doctor away, Mae West
Saturday, April 3, 2010
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
And here we are......
I don't have much to say. I wanna scream I wanna bitch, I wanna cry.... and I have NO idea why. Time for better meds..........
Friday, January 8, 2010
Why sometimes life is like a hemmorhoid......
Ya know when you get that stinging sensation.... and we all know where.... I am of the personal belief that more often than not, Life itself is like the hemmorhoid... a slow and painful process which will more then likely still be there tomorrow, just as fucking sore as it was today..........
Food for thought.... From my demented Ambien raddled mind.....
Food for thought.... From my demented Ambien raddled mind.....
Monday, January 4, 2010
Part of me
I'd like to be the girl I once was
it wasn't that long ago she was there
a smile on her face the wind in her hair
the pain not yet present, the age not yet there
She seems so young so very carefree
It's hard to look at her and know it was me
A life so simple, a smile so easy
A simple grace that is no longer around me
So proud and so strong, so young and so free
she doesn't recognize what she sees as I stand before her
tired and worn, ragged and torn
I know who I was, she knows not whats to come
The pain that's deep inside, the battles within
the things that make me not feel like myself within my skin.
The actual events may not seem to grim
The pain that they caused almost not able to be kept in
Family ties, old family legends and lore
the stories I'd been told, the things I'd been taught
like treasures to unfold.
I try to recall them, and share them with the kids
the things that we'd done
the places we've been
the people that we were and the homes we've lived in
The sauce that only Grandma could make
The cookies that I would help her bake
The garden so full of delish things
The tomatoes lined up in grandpas lil rings
Pumpkins and cucumbers peppers and more
all in sizes not found in the store
These things that I have left inside my head
the things you can't do now that your dead
The kids won't have the memories,
they won't know the lore, I have to pass the stories
There's things I won't know, people I can't name
Faces of people that I never knew.
Those people have the stories, those people have the key
They hold our past, they know our history
I wish that you were here ,it's selfish, I know
the reality is, the sad and grieving woman,
is what's left of me
The young and careless woman, her smile fades away
her strength is now a facade
Her hair is turning grey
Her smile's not so fast
All that she can do, is hold onto the past.
it wasn't that long ago she was there
a smile on her face the wind in her hair
the pain not yet present, the age not yet there
She seems so young so very carefree
It's hard to look at her and know it was me
A life so simple, a smile so easy
A simple grace that is no longer around me
So proud and so strong, so young and so free
she doesn't recognize what she sees as I stand before her
tired and worn, ragged and torn
I know who I was, she knows not whats to come
The pain that's deep inside, the battles within
the things that make me not feel like myself within my skin.
The actual events may not seem to grim
The pain that they caused almost not able to be kept in
Family ties, old family legends and lore
the stories I'd been told, the things I'd been taught
like treasures to unfold.
I try to recall them, and share them with the kids
the things that we'd done
the places we've been
the people that we were and the homes we've lived in
The sauce that only Grandma could make
The cookies that I would help her bake
The garden so full of delish things
The tomatoes lined up in grandpas lil rings
Pumpkins and cucumbers peppers and more
all in sizes not found in the store
These things that I have left inside my head
the things you can't do now that your dead
The kids won't have the memories,
they won't know the lore, I have to pass the stories
There's things I won't know, people I can't name
Faces of people that I never knew.
Those people have the stories, those people have the key
They hold our past, they know our history
I wish that you were here ,it's selfish, I know
the reality is, the sad and grieving woman,
is what's left of me
The young and careless woman, her smile fades away
her strength is now a facade
Her hair is turning grey
Her smile's not so fast
All that she can do, is hold onto the past.
You PMS like a bitch I would know.......
So overload on the brain..... VENT!
First of all... if you are in a position of authority over me, and you send me an email that the first line reads "not to be snotty".... I do take it snotty.... I also think that your bitchy... and rude... and multiple other issues that I don't wanna get into..... I realize that as even my chose Internet name implies, I enjoy the chaos that life has to offer. I am one of the few humans that actually enjoys the chaos... I can live within the chaos, or I can chose to reign it in... I relish my own personal chaos. I enjoy being the one that people come to when the chaos gets over their head. I thrive in the chaos....
Second, to the financially in charge people.... HOW THE fuck are you expecting to EVER make money, when you have account managers who have NO CLUE what the fuck they are supposed to do!
I realize that I do not know very much about running a business.... but I do know a little bit about life... and you can't have both of your feet, on different pages.... it all gotta work together....
The whole work situation...STINKS! I am seriously starting to feel really good about the whole star trek utopia thing.. do what you love, we'll take care of the rest.... Money always seems to be the root of all the evils, not enough... and you feel like shit, and try everything you can to get more of it... Too much of it, and you have no clue what to do with it! Just like in the rest of life, THERE IS NO MIDDLE GROUND!!!!! Somehow I had this impression that throwing all of my thoughts and random bullshit out there, would somehow make me feel better.
In the long run I feel the same, except now a few people think I am nuts, and somewhere some little red light went off next to my name in a deep dark hole in the ground the government doesn't think we all know about. Face it: the only way it could be worse is if I went to the library and rented catcher in the rye and a bomb making book LOL.....
Everyone always has a breaking point. I was hopefully that this year would get better, which given the state of last year... really shouldn't be that hard to achieve.....
We have a court date for the 25th of January for the cho mo case... and please don't forget, if you live in the Colorado area, I am more than happy to send the address off to you, I cannot post it up here due to the whole slander/libel thing. I can however email my close personal friends all the info that they need, want, and can handle, on keeping this particular piece of shit away from you and anyone else that you love.
On a slightly newer note, I have declared myself a demonologist! After watching a multitude of re-tarded badly made -B- list movies.... I have determined that not only should my ministers licence allow me to marry you, but it should also allow me to exorcise demons from your home for INSANE prices.... all voluntary donations, of course..... And if you'd like I can provide a notarized letter stating that I have preformed the exorcism.... and declaring the home ghost and demon free.... Good idea?? Anyone... any bites.... Do I seriously have to send my children and dogs to make noises in the middle of the night....
What about mildly insane prices?? What if I work it off in trade... awww fuck.... somethings gotta give....
"An angel clipped my wings, from the back of a broken dream, so they'll probably never break my fall again." Flogging Molly, On the back of a broken dream.....
First of all... if you are in a position of authority over me, and you send me an email that the first line reads "not to be snotty".... I do take it snotty.... I also think that your bitchy... and rude... and multiple other issues that I don't wanna get into..... I realize that as even my chose Internet name implies, I enjoy the chaos that life has to offer. I am one of the few humans that actually enjoys the chaos... I can live within the chaos, or I can chose to reign it in... I relish my own personal chaos. I enjoy being the one that people come to when the chaos gets over their head. I thrive in the chaos....
Second, to the financially in charge people.... HOW THE fuck are you expecting to EVER make money, when you have account managers who have NO CLUE what the fuck they are supposed to do!
I realize that I do not know very much about running a business.... but I do know a little bit about life... and you can't have both of your feet, on different pages.... it all gotta work together....
The whole work situation...STINKS! I am seriously starting to feel really good about the whole star trek utopia thing.. do what you love, we'll take care of the rest.... Money always seems to be the root of all the evils, not enough... and you feel like shit, and try everything you can to get more of it... Too much of it, and you have no clue what to do with it! Just like in the rest of life, THERE IS NO MIDDLE GROUND!!!!! Somehow I had this impression that throwing all of my thoughts and random bullshit out there, would somehow make me feel better.
In the long run I feel the same, except now a few people think I am nuts, and somewhere some little red light went off next to my name in a deep dark hole in the ground the government doesn't think we all know about. Face it: the only way it could be worse is if I went to the library and rented catcher in the rye and a bomb making book LOL.....
Everyone always has a breaking point. I was hopefully that this year would get better, which given the state of last year... really shouldn't be that hard to achieve.....
We have a court date for the 25th of January for the cho mo case... and please don't forget, if you live in the Colorado area, I am more than happy to send the address off to you, I cannot post it up here due to the whole slander/libel thing. I can however email my close personal friends all the info that they need, want, and can handle, on keeping this particular piece of shit away from you and anyone else that you love.
On a slightly newer note, I have declared myself a demonologist! After watching a multitude of re-tarded badly made -B- list movies.... I have determined that not only should my ministers licence allow me to marry you, but it should also allow me to exorcise demons from your home for INSANE prices.... all voluntary donations, of course..... And if you'd like I can provide a notarized letter stating that I have preformed the exorcism.... and declaring the home ghost and demon free.... Good idea?? Anyone... any bites.... Do I seriously have to send my children and dogs to make noises in the middle of the night....
What about mildly insane prices?? What if I work it off in trade... awww fuck.... somethings gotta give....
"An angel clipped my wings, from the back of a broken dream, so they'll probably never break my fall again." Flogging Molly, On the back of a broken dream.....
Friday, January 1, 2010
poor old Michael Finigin, begin again
And the bitch has been quiet LOL....
Had a very crazy few weeks. Got Xmas out of the way, had an awesome day with the kiddos, and the Stalcer-White family, relaxed, slept and am moving on with what I sure fucking hope is a better year.
Got a second job, another full time beast, since the hubbs is laid off... lucky fucking me, 80 hour weeks always make for good times! Gonna live on coffee and smokes, maybe my fat ass will lose some weight! Trying to rip a shit ton of movies to my itunes so I can keep my ass awake all night... oh wait, there will be some one who probably shit themselves may do that for me. Just added the link to blog via text.... Keep everyone posted.... Ok noone reads this, so I guess keeping myself posted to keep my sanity.....
To all the fuckers who did something retarded or fucked up to me or anyone else I care about.... I.E. Jennifer Young.... Nikki Workman.... Jerri Cheeseman.... Heather Antoinne..... and numerous other mothafuckas that I can't think of at the moment........ FUCK OFF AND DIE........
To all the people I care about, and care about me.... I hope that we all have a kick ass 2010.... We fucking deserve it after our 09.... Much luv!!!
the bitch.........
"White trash queen, American Dream, Oh what a role model..... Throwin a fit, making a scene... Like no tomorrow..." Papa Roach, Hollywood Whore
Had a very crazy few weeks. Got Xmas out of the way, had an awesome day with the kiddos, and the Stalcer-White family, relaxed, slept and am moving on with what I sure fucking hope is a better year.
Got a second job, another full time beast, since the hubbs is laid off... lucky fucking me, 80 hour weeks always make for good times! Gonna live on coffee and smokes, maybe my fat ass will lose some weight! Trying to rip a shit ton of movies to my itunes so I can keep my ass awake all night... oh wait, there will be some one who probably shit themselves may do that for me. Just added the link to blog via text.... Keep everyone posted.... Ok noone reads this, so I guess keeping myself posted to keep my sanity.....
To all the fuckers who did something retarded or fucked up to me or anyone else I care about.... I.E. Jennifer Young.... Nikki Workman.... Jerri Cheeseman.... Heather Antoinne..... and numerous other mothafuckas that I can't think of at the moment........ FUCK OFF AND DIE........
To all the people I care about, and care about me.... I hope that we all have a kick ass 2010.... We fucking deserve it after our 09.... Much luv!!!
the bitch.........
"White trash queen, American Dream, Oh what a role model..... Throwin a fit, making a scene... Like no tomorrow..." Papa Roach, Hollywood Whore
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